The Girl Next Door

The Girl Next Door:

Okay, I admit it, I still live with my mom and dad, but what’s wrong with that? They pay for everything: my food, my clothes, even my entertainment, though I must say, I’m pretty easy to please. Heck, I even let them tuck me in at night, but that’s more to give them a sense of worth than anything else. But mostly, I stick around because of the girl next door.

She really is something else. I think you'd agree if you ever met her.

It was love at first sight. When she walked in the front door I fell for her worse than a startled old crow trying to dance on an electric fence, literally! Suddenly, I got all weak in the knees and had to lower to the floor. And yes, it was humiliating, sitting there on the tile like a dang toad in a fairytale waiting to be kissed, but she acted like it was nothing and gave me the sweetest smile I thought I’d die.

Then she bent over and whispered, “Hi there big boy, my name’s Candy,” in a syrupy voice so sweet I ached to lean in and lick the words right off her tongue. I didn’t want to wait for them to reach my ears; I needed to taste them the second they came out of her mouth. I mean, what would go through your head if someone said that to you? Believe me, I almost choked on my spit.

As if that wasn’t enough to send me over the edge – now picture this if you can – there I was splayed out on my butt, staring straight into the top of her blouse at the perkiest little melon breasts a man could imagine. They were absolute perfection! Her nipples were barely hidden under the lace of her bra, but I could see the faint darkened halos of her aureoles pressed against the sheer pink fabric. It took my breath away.

I know you’d call me a pig if I told you what happened next, but I couldn’t help myself. Without thinking, I brought my hands up and cupped her breasts. It seemed like the natural thing to do. Now keep in mind that she hadn’t walked in the door more than a minute earlier and here I was, already showing my appreciation for her feminine attributes. She should’ve slapped my face, kicked me in the groin, and called the cops.

But she didn’t.

And she didn’t move away.

Instead, she gave me a little smooch on the cheek, helped me to my feet then led me to the couch.

It was almost embarrassing because my mom and dad were standing right there watching every move. I couldn’t wait for them to get the hell out of the house so I’d have Candy all to myself, but they must’ve dithered in the doorway for five minutes or so before they finally took off.

Less than ten seconds after their car pulled out of the driveway, Candy turned to me. “You want to play some games?” she asked.

Stunned by the rapid evolution of our relationship, I was speechless. All I could do was nod.

Well, I won’t go into all the details of our antics. Suffice it to say that at the end of the evening, I came out totally exhausted.

It was a dream come true.

That night I slept like a baby.

So, that's why I stick around these parts. It's because of the girl next door. And honestly, I'd really like to just crawl on over and move in with her right now, but it might be better if I wait until I’m potty-trained and learn to talk.